


No Chessboard's Big Enough For This Game

by TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel



Series: Hell Must Be Freezing Over [3]
Category: Good Omens, X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom, X-Men: First Class - Fandom
Genre: AU, BFFs, Charles & Erik are BAMFs, Charles is a Demon, Crack, Erik has no respect for authority, Erik is an angel, Friendship, Gen, Humour, angels & demons, demons are inherently rebellious, fusion fic, idek
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2011-12-17
Updated: 2011-12-17
Packaged: 2017-10-27 11:03:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/295120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel/pseuds/TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Charles and Erik are a demon and angel who, during the long time they have been stationed on Earth, have somehow forged a peculiar friendship.</p><p>The birth of the Antichrist signals the impending end of that friendship - not to mention that of the Earth.</p><p>Charles, however, has other ideas.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Chessboard's Big Enough For This Game

**Author's Note:**

> Take one best-selling, cracked-out apocalyptic novel. Add a bunch of fantastic characters from an awesome mutant movie. Shake, stir, and serve.
> 
> (Basically, here's my retelling of _Good Omens,_ fused with _X-Men: First Class._ )

  


* * *

  
**PROLOGUE**

* * *

   
 ** _Approximately 6,000 years ago…_**  
   
   


The Garden of Eden had four gates.  
   
Not so very long ago these had been unguarded, but then there was the whole unpleasantness with The Being Formerly Known as Sataniel (everyone hoped that he chose a new name soon, because his current one was rather unwieldy), and since then members of the cherubim had been stationed at each gate, just in case someone tried something.  
   
At the Eastern Gate, a single cherub stood. Judging by the fuss earlier that day, somebody _had_ tried something, and succeeded. He didn’t know exactly what had taken place, or which of the Guardians of the Gate had let someone in, but he suspected that he had good reason to be glad it wasn’t him.  
   
He felt a sort of dour satisfaction at the idea that whoever had fallen short of their duty would be appropriately penalised for their failure, although he would of course deny it if asked.  
   
Right now, there was also a snake, attempting to slither stealthily past the cherub’s foot.  
   
The foot moved to block the snake’s path.  
   
The snake looked up.  
   
The Guardian of the Eastern Gate looked down.  
   
“Ah. Hello,” said the snake.  
   
The expression on the cherub’s face didn’t change. It was, to put it mildly, uncompromising.  
   
The snake tried for an open and innocent smile. It didn’t work particularly well. Snakes are not designed to smile.  
   
“It’s a nice day, isn’t it?”  
   
“Not for you,” said the angel grimly. “What are you doing here?”  
   
Yellow eyes stared up guilelessly. That didn’t really work, either.  
   
“What do you mean? I’m a snake.”  
   
The cherub smiled. It wasn’t a nice smile, and there were a startling number of teeth considering that the smiler was an angel.  
   
“Do you really expect me to believe that?”  
   
The snake deflated.  
   
“Well, it was worth a shot,” it said ruefully. “Look, perhaps we should start over. I’m Charazel.”  
   
“Merikael,” the angel allowed.  
   
“Yes, well, Merikael, what I’d really like right now is to quietly slip away now that all the fuss has died down, and that way, no one has to deal with the awkward question of what to do with the demon who infiltrated the garden, and I don’t have to worry about coming to bodily harm.”  
   
Merikael considered. It was true that while catching someone attempting to sneak _in_ to the garden was a simple enough situation to deal with, it was rather more awkward to explain that you had caught someone sneaking _out._ There wasn’t exactly an established protocol for that kind of thing.  
   
And Merikael had been glad that all the commotion of earlier had died down. To resurrect it now when nothing could be done about the situation would be tiresome.  
   
“What did you do?” he asked the demon.  
   
Charazel gave a charming and mischievous grin. Somehow it worked, even on a snake.  
   
“Well, do you know that tree in the middle of the garden? The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil?”  
   
Merikael did indeed know. He had an ominous feeling about where there was going.  
   
“Yes, of course you do. I’m sure you also know that the humans were forbidden to eat of it, yes? Well, that and the other one, but I can’t imagine the trouble if one of them ate of the Tree of Immortality, can you? Best to avoid that situation entirely. Anyway, it’s possible that someone _might_ have convinced them to eat of the Tree. The first one.”  
   
The snake smiled smugly.  
   
Merikael didn’t sigh. He simply gave the snake an immensely unimpressed stare.  
   
“What? Why are you looking at me like that?”  
   
“Get out of here,” the cherub said dryly. “Before I change my mind.”  
   
The snake had the audacity to grin at him.  
   
“It was rather good, don’t you think?”  
   
The Guardian of the Eastern Gate glared at him.  
   
“Right, I’m going.” The snake started to wind its way through the Eastern Gate. “By the way,” it added slyly, “I seem to remember that you had a rather impressive sword last time I saw you. Lost it, did you?”  
   
Merikael didn’t respond and did his best to look as though he hadn’t heard.  
   
“You _rebel,_ Merikael,” the demon said approvingly as it vanished into the undergrowth.  
   
Merikael glowered at its retreating back.  
   
   
   
 


End file.
